NOTE TO SELF.

I stand here today making the single most important decision of my career. I have to choose between the life others want for me and the life that satisfies my daily hunger for new challenges, adventures and risk taking. The former one being the sensible one , the mature one , the one that makes my life cake walk after just a week or so of effort ,the one that others want from me or say expect from me , the ones that millions of people my age take and the one that is the most convenient for any woman my age .The latter is the road less taken , the one I dream for every minute of my day, the one that is not at all going to be easy, the one that will make me wanna look around every time someone my age achieves something really outstanding, the one where I will have to  take responsibility for even smallest and  the most innocent of my mistakes, the one where I might not have the capability to even handle and might just push away even the last set of homo sapiens that manage to live in my rainbow wall of happiness.






I lived 17 years always choosing the former one. Every time it lead to making everyone around me happy , somewhat proud or say something to flaunt about and eventually a comfortable life. But as far as I can stretch back my memory , it felt caged, boring , living without an ambition , passionless , unhappy deep down and full of regrets. I cannot get back those years of my life . But I am glad all that happened for such a prolonged period so as to leave a deep impact on my life.

The monotony of a sad lexicon still resonate with my unconscious mind like melancholy strains to the soul.


For the last three years now , I have always chosen the latter one in any such similar fork scenario. For three years , I have happily worked a little too much , cried a little too much , broken down a little too much , begged for second chances a little too much , learnt a little too much , spoken a little too much , lied a little too much , taken risks a little too much , felt passionate a little too much , felt connected to the issues that genuinely matter to the real me and loved a little too much .
But till day , there is not one regret in my heart from the last three years.
We are the choices we take and the decisions we make . I might not  have achieved something in context to what is expected of me , but I am the best possible version of myself . I chose the road less taken and that has made all the difference.

This time this decision being tougher than ever which makes wanna set a step back and think again . But then what is the fun about taking a risk if its given a little too much thought . I write this article with the intent of reminding myself years later about my fierce will power, courage and the audacity to choose my passion and happiness over dark shadows of regret.



So , the older version of me , when you read this just remember to be the girl on fire like you have been for last three years and more now , irrespective of where and in what state you are in right now .


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